When designing a game that aims to emulate hundreds of games that have come before it, adding no spin of its own, it's a good idea to at least offer something extra in the form of neat controls, or slick visuals.

You won't find any such sops here. It's actually surprising just how dull and monotone World Conqueror 3D manages to be. It's as if the developer were purposely attempting to make the dullest strategy game ever.

Dip it in vinegar

World Conqueror 3D provides a world map, split into regions, with different coloured troops dumped in each one. The idea is to take your troops, move into other territories, and attack the enemy.

You can bunch troops together for big attacks, move troops into boats and attack by sea, or try your luck and go for a more risky strategy. If you've played any similar strategy games, including the boardgame Risk, you know how this plays already.

But World Conqueror 3D is so basic and boring that you'll want to steer hundreds of feet clear of it - with a barge pole for good measure.

Those looking for an explanation of how to play won't find a tutorial. Instead they'll discover some static images with text that doesn't do a very good job of describing the gameplay.

That would be fine for some games, but for this - a game that, in a lot of places, doesn't even appear to make sense - a tutorial is desperately needed.

But World Conqueror 3D is an awful experience for reasons beyond lack of clarity.

Dip it in acid

The controls are the first sticking point. You'd think a game about moving units around a world map could utilise the touchscreen quite well, but you'd be wrong.

You can tap the touchscreen to move the top-screen view, but that's about it. You can't slide the bottom screen, and to select units you use the circle pad to move a mouse pointer on the top screen. It's inane.

The game is nearly entirely static images, the only sign of animation being the arrows that stretch between territories, and a few frames when units attack each other. It looks awful throughout.

The action is slow and boring as a result, although it doesn't help that the AI is utterly vacuous, and can take rather a long time to make up its mind about its next move.

The real killer is that you've already played this game numerous times before, and every time you've played it it's been better experience than this. Nothing about World Conqueror 3D is good, or even okay - it's just plain pointless.

If you're considering picking up World Conqueror 3D, don't bother - just dig your old copy of Risk out of the wardrobe, and give that a bash instead.