The floorboards were creaking under the weight of our embarrassment when this one hit the desk. 'Sexy Orgynizer? Surely, this was some sort of joke. Puns aren't rare in porn game titles, but this one came with its own vacuum-packed nudge-nudge-wink, just to make sure you were in on the joke.
Lingering within a towering stack (albeit metaphorical) of blue titles to be reviewed in the near future, this one was nestled-away safely for a sunny day, with the idea that playing it on a grim Tuesday morning might be too much to bear.
Once into the game though, the startling realisation hits you - the name actually relates to the gameplay in a way that's neither redundant nor generic. It's the sort of realisation that comes like a slap in the face and demands a 'By Jove!'
Yes, you are indeed organising orgies in Sexy Orgynizer. In each level you have a 'room' made up of tile-like rectangular squares. You have to fill these with your orgy participants. Looking like cards but acting a lot more like dominos, each of these has a colour - green, red, blue and so on (rather than shades of ethnicity).
There are also cards with multiple colours, usually split diagonally down the middle. You have to match up the colours so that each of your participants is, well, happy. Exactly what sort of happy we'll leave to your imagination.
If, once the room is full, there are points where different-coloured edges meet, it's game over, as presumably a member of the orgy squad gets all upset and overturns a table or something. However, you can move the inhabitants of the room about as you wish mid-level.
Considering you only have a 'hand' of three different participants to choose from at each turn, Sexy Orgynizer makes proceedings a little easier by including three shuffle opportunities each level, as well as joker cards. The shuffle option changes the three cards in your hand. Joker cards won't net you a lot of points, but they will sit happily against any colour. If you ever find yourself in a relationship with a real-life 'joker', you should probably walk the other way post-haste.
There are sixty rooms you have to complete and, like most other porn games, there are some adult images to unlock on the way. You're awarded one every ten levels. Considering the gameplay can be fairly taxing, it could be said that Sexy Orgynizer expects a little too much from its audience.
It's something we've criticised adult games for in the past, but Sexy Orgyniser redeems itself by adding 18 other achievements. Like the best achievements on Xbox Live, some of these will you into changing your play style - daring you to complete a number of levels without using the joker card, for instance.
Compelling as this may be though, Sexy Orgynizer is still perhaps a little too cruel. The game doesn't save your progress once you've failed a room, and each time you fail it's back to level one. The fact that there are also two unlockable, harder difficulty levels, unlocked once you've completed the game on the previous difficulty, goes to show quite how much hardcore player potential there is in this title.
We just wish it had been made a little more casual-friendly, especially given the 18+ section-surfing audience, who are unlikely to be looking for a hardcore game (not in that sense anyway).
In spite of these reservations, Sexy Orgynizer remains one of the best adult games you can buy on mobile. The gameplay has an unusually strong link to 'what it says on the tin', plus the idea is a little ingenious in itself. As long as you're not opposed to the idea of matching up dozens and dozens of blokes (and women), Sexy Orgynizer is a surprise winner.