The free iPhone game Trawler Report: Sir Lovalot, Parsec, Battle Bears-1

This week’s freebies represent a bit of a freeze on originality, but a gentle warming over of quality gameplay.

None of these games is going to rock your world, but each and every one of them should keep you entertained for an hour or two. Better yet, save them up for TV ad breaks, so you can distract yourself from the nauseating display of so many celebrity cash-ins.

None is as nauseating as our Crap App pick, of course. Whoever made this monstrosity is getting coal in their stocking this year. Or something far worse, preferably.

See you next week for the final Trawler Report of the year.

Battle Bears-1
By SkyVu
Type Full

If you’re coming to Battle Bears-1 from the fun-but-limited predecessor Battle Bears: Zombies, you’re in for a mild shock.

While the last game was an on-rails blaster, Battle Bears-1 gives you your legs back, so to speak. Rather than a mindless static shooter, it’s now a mindless third-person run and gunner.

It gets rather repetitive, and the environments are a little bland, but Battle Bears-1’s unpretentiously entertaining gameplay and amusing cut-scenes make it worthy of a download.

Get Battle Bears-1 here

Tiki Totems Premium
By Rafal Staszewski
Type

Have you played the one where you have to guide an object gently down to the ground by strategically removing its supporting blocks? Of course you have, there are loads of physics puzzler like this on the App Store. Tiki Totems is one of the better ones, with a nice bright art style and a pleasant knock-about physics engine that teeters just the right side of unpredictable.

Like most of the games on the list this week, what Tiki Totems lacks in originality it makes up for in polished fun.

Get Tiki Totems Premium here

Parsec
By IdeaKnow
Type Full

Yes, there are millions of old skool shoot-‘em-ups on the iPhone. We know. But Parsec, while not exactly revolutionising the genre, stands out by being a really well-made example.

While it’s essentially a Space Invaders clone, Parsec livens things up with an art style that’s reminiscent of Geometry Wars. It has that same, clean, retro-neon look to it.

Otherwise it’s business as usual, blasting variously shapes of enemies flying in various formations. Some beefy power-ups spice things up considerably.

Get Parsec here

Pick of the week

Sir Lovalot
By Hungry Game
Type Full

If there are millions of old skool shoot-‘em-ups on the App Store, there must be billions of perpetual-climbers. Once again, though, Sir Lovalot stands out for being really nicely made.

The goal is to hop your randy knight up an improbably massive tower, avoiding pitfalls and skipping into any open windows for an – ahem – bonus.

The best thing about it is the presentation, with an artfully implemented 3D tower rotating convincingly. There’s bags of appeal to be found in the character art, too.

Get Sir Lovalot here Crap apps

Clink! - Cheers to you!
By /dev/noise Consulting
Type Full

For many, we’re approaching the season for excessive alcohol consumption and the routine salutations that accompany it. This app helps you with… absolutely nothing, actually.

Rather, Clink simulates the glass-clinking “cheers!” experience. Minus the alcohol, minus the friends, and minus the glass. So everything that makes the act itself what it is. Good one.

The app offers up five different types of glass, each with its own clinking sound that’s activated by shaking your iPhone. Oh, and a Popular Toasts section that contains some quotes that aren’t even proper toasts.

Here’s one the developer can have for free: “may your app go the way of Timothy Langdell.”