Special report! Real all about it! News! These are some of the things that you might hear in an adult, reserved news room. The sort of place that wouldn't make a joke when someone called Doug Bowser takes over at Nintendo of America; the sort of joyless, mirthless hole that no one would ever want to spend any time in.

Luckily here at Pocket Gamer we're neither reserved nor adult. We're essentially giddy cynics who bite at any chance to try and do something out of the ordinary. We're so whacky that sometimes we complain about people doing a thing, and then go and do the thing anyway. Oh me oh my are we ever the zaniest mobile gaming website on the internet.

Anyway, since Bowser is now in charge at Nintendo, it seemed sensible to make a list of other villains that would also make great heads of companies. Or bad heads of companies. To be honest, this is mainly just a list of some classic bad guys with some jokes thrown in there. They're good jokes though, well worth reading.

Look, it's Friday, and everyone else is doing it. Don't judge us, just come along for the joyous, weird, and occasionally rambling ride. Honest, we reckon you're going to have the best time. There are puns too!