It's just a hunch, but I think I've discovered why those infamous weapons of mass destruction were never found in post-war Iraq: they weren't looking for balloons. Never mind missiles or nuclear bombs - huge bouncing balloons can bring down whole armies, take out national monuments and generally cause havoc across the globe.
Before you head down to your local party store to perform a citizen's arrest, it's worth pointing out that this is only true in the world of Pang - formally known as Buster Bros for those in the US - where ridding the world of bouncing balloons (or bubbles, no-one's ever been sure) seemingly intent on bringing our way of life to an end is the order of the day.
A remake of a 1980s arcade classic, Pang has you firing hooks at balloons that bound across the screen. Each balloon you pierce splits into two smaller ones, which then become targets to take down in their own right until you finally manage to eradicate the teeny tiny balls they inevitably become.
It's actually far more complex than it might initially sound. Contact with any of the balloons - big or small - snatches precious life away, the smallest series of missteps ends a game before it's even begun. With smaller balloons bouncing at a lower height and representing a tougher target than large ones, managing to keep out of their path is a constant challenge.
Pang also adds elements to the levels themselves - platforms, ladders, etc - that add a platforming edge to the puzzle. There are even bonuses that pop down from burst balloons and platforms that spice up the affair.
Fortunately, taking out each balloon doesn't require a direct hit from the hook. Harpooning their way across the screen, the hooks at your disposal always fire vertically, but they hang in the air for a couple of seconds, meaning any balloons that bounce into them while they're upright are popped.
As such, the game becomes a balancing act between positioning yourself (getting trapped between two balloons heading your direction is never a good idea) and firing your hooks at just the right time - waiting until the balloon is directly above you is often too late.
With all the controls handled adequately by the touchscreen (a 'fire' button on the right deals with the hooks, while a pad on the left oversees all movement), Pang is thankfully more a question of thinking than doing.
Though hardened fans may disagree, Pang hasn't aged all that well in the 20-odd years since it first hit the arcades. Compared to the leagues of similar puzzlers already on the App Store (and, indeed, the cheaper Pang clones already available), play here feels a little limited, the two modes on offer - Tour and Survival - not really justifying the game's premium price.
Though Player-X's Pang might come with the official license, alternatives like Laserbug, with their slight twists on this staple formula, actually offer a brighter take on the balloon busting genre. Pang is one bubble that hasn't quite burst, then, but it's not flying as high as some of its rivals.